Honestly, I'm not that into Chinese New Year. My friends asked me the other day whether I celebrate it or not. Well, I do because it does bring my family together and you get to spend that quality time you don't usually get. My two younger sisters are still pretty much babies coming to their own but becoming wiser each year. My parents are getting older. I'm reaching my prime. So, why not have CNY, it brings us together.

Leah in church asked me if I was going to visit relatives. My answer was we were going to see some close friends this year. Actually, I have a cousin Almerick who became a scholar here and an aunt as well who has a family here. We have two families who are close friends and have children coming to their own time like my younger sisters.

Maybe I do celebrate it, maybe I'm not too into it. Yeah, it's been a good break but whenever I'm not out, I haven't left the classroom at all. I've been studying hard and concentrating on making my own life this year. Be more Independent and hungier for that adventure and that life we truly desire.

I read Psalm 37 today, and I haven't looked back on the choices I've made this year. Maybe I haven't been able to look at it clearly as well as I did in Jan 1. After all, I was an hour late for the new year, but still I got a lot to work on. A lot to fix. A whole lot to give. I love my family, friends , and God. I don't love my life because of my choices but I love it because of the people in it and how they have changed it. Well, I guess I did celebrate it after all. Gong Xi Fa Cai.......eh ....Happy CNY.

I don't think a lot of people realize. You've turned 20. I turned 20 just 3 weeks ago.

5 weeks ago, I earned my drivers license and drove my mom and little sister to the mall with the guidance of my driver. He joked that it would be my turn to wait in the car.

A month ago, I was climbing at Climb On! 08 and was with some climbers from Singapore Polytechnic. 3 weeks after, I'm throwing punches in kick boxing to try my hand at Mixed Martial Arts. Even while climbing I was already interested to enroll in Brazilian Ju Jitsu and Submission Wrestling and watching Fight Quest and Human Weapon.

4 years ago. I was in a whole new world coming into Singapore. My dad rode with me to school just to check out the place, but I haven't really grown up then even though I was feeling ready. I still thought I was someone who needed to prove something, I didn't do well in my entrance so the Vice-Principal challenged me. I fought my authorities in a way but I also fought my demons. I was more fatigued that usual and getting fit was a huge problem. I walked longer roads and longer bike rides. I walked or rode to church , the market, or just for fun. I didn't do movies or shopping. I watched sports all the time and just tried to learn not to mess up.

5 years ago. I was at my mind's prime. I wanted to become a journalist or a detective. I learned to consider all possibilities, explore my chances, and win on my court. making a lot of important choices.....Family becomes my first priority right away.

Today. I've been working out. I feel great. I'm at the best shape of my life and I'm looking to make a good chance and opportunity to help my family in the business. 21, your on your own, parents leave you alone but talk to you once in a while before you leave the house or when you sleep.

You can say all you want to say but when it comes down. It's here. Let's win.

Somebody just hit me hard. Twice I forgot the same thing. I've been lazy. I've been tired. After pushing through the week, i went broke on the weekends.

I'm broken down and really low. Reasons why I have been silent and inactive, I lost my cool in a way through boredrom not anger. People usually lose it through anger but I really lose it through boredrom.

I just push anger in another direction. Push it into energy. On Thursday, I was really mad I couldn't handle the training as well as I used to do. I was just really mad I was really to break the coke machine. I did punch it. I yelled a bit. I don't know. I don't remember. My shin hurts.

Some of my body parts hurt. I don't know why. Maybe I haven't been working out well or something.

I'm slightly depressed but not completely. Just don't expect me to talk too much on the bus.

I'm really not into it.

If we really can't put it together, we really need depression. It helps us get back down to earth. Look at the mirror and work it out. Depressed but not knocked out. I'll probably be down in school tomorrow sulking a bit and lost.

I actually like being this way. Gives me a lot of motivation to just work twice as hard. I'm not backing down. Ever. D.

Christmas passed without me blogging. It meant I didn't have time to do so. I was really caught up in the moment. So this is what I wrote in my own little time on the plane back home......

"Everybody needs a home. On Christmas day, let’s look back on our memories good or bad. Christmas means that Jesus Christ came to earth born as a baby on one holy night. It’s also only a few days before the start of the new year. Maybe, God put it there intentionally for all of us to have something to love or appreciate each year. We may still have three months to pay the rent, another 3 months of school, another period of tests to come by, a thousands miles from family and friends, but what we’ll always have is a Christmas cheer and a reason to be thankful that we have a short one day where we don’t have to work and can sit and enjoy a home cooked meal. To me Christmas has always been about giving wherever I am, whether with family or friends I always wanna give people a reason to smile or be happy this year. It’s not easy to find something to smile at or be happy about but it’s always worth the while to make someone’s else day. When people say it’s the thought that counts, just look at a friend’s face when he or she gets a greeting or present for you. Our present may be cheap or something we didn’t want but the thing is that this person cares for you and wanted to let you know that your special this year.

Every Christmas it feels great to be able to have a simple party for all the workers at my dad’s factory, we have our toys and snacks for the kids and money and food for the parents. It just feels great that you could give something this Christmas. I can never forget the faces of orphans I visited a few Christmases ago when we went over and had a huge party for them. There five orphans who lived in the school while the rest lived on the streets. I saw some kids who even saved their food for thier parents. Some of us willingly gave up ours to give them something to eat too. It’s always a great to give.

I just wish that every Christmas we can make someone happy and that would make my day to make someone feels special. Look around you, it’s Christmas, something would be wrong if everybody didn’t do anything. Our family wants a little attention from us to just be with them. A few friends just want a little “hello” and “how are you?” to make their day. People don’t know it but they always want to be remembered on Christmas day. I remember every person I met this year and thank God and pray that I can make them smile by letting them know they’re remembered even if they don’t remember me I know my family and close friends remember me and that’s enough for a Christmas cheer. Merry Christmas everybody."

Yeah it's a little late but I've been gone so long I just thought well might as well post it.

It's never easy to win. Neither is it easy to ever end the year on a good note. You'll never know when your gonna have the time of your life, you'll never know when your gonna fall in love. You'll never know when your gonna fail, you'll never know when your gonna die ; but, you can still enjoy life as it goes by having the time of your life everyday even on a bad day, you know you can never give up on something you haven't given a chance to grow on you, you know that you can make someone happy through love , you know you have a family that loves you and cares for you, you know that your gonna die someday but God's gonna decide on that day and I leave it to him.

I'm happy where I am now. I wanna travel the world. Everytime I look at someone's else blog they say they wanna do this and that. I never did take a piece of paper and write it down.

1. Love God and my family and my friends

2.Travel around the world even if it's just a few days.

3.Get a job that make people happy even if they don't know me.

4.Make my dad and mom proud even if it's just seeing me graduate or get my diploma.

5.Reach high for a degree.

6.See my younger sisters become more successful than me.

7.Keep in touch with friends even after school's way over and when we begin our careers.

It's what I most want right now......not an I-pod, I -phone, a pair of shoes, a million dollars......just this.

My New Year's Resolution....get hungier.